Updated: Jan 31, 2019
Your bestie has asked you to be her Maid of Honour aka Chief Bridesmaid, but what does this actually mean for you? Well, let us break it down and give you a rough idea of what you should expect to be taking care of in the build up to your pal’s big day! An important thing to keep in mind is that every bride is going to have different expectations of her MOH and Bridesmaids, so it’s important to be honest and open with each other from the get go!
1. COORDINATING THE BRIDESMAIDS
The best way to do this in 2019 is to set up a Whatsapp or Facebook group chat for you and the Bridesmaids to keep in touch easily and discuss all things Wedding and Hen Party (yes, you will have to plan this too! More on that later). Your job is to keep the bridal party in the know, and don’t be afraid to delegate roles out to other people within the group. You will have a lot on your plate so there is nothing wrong with sharing the tasks and responsibilities out between you all! Things to be discussed will include bridesmaid dress fittings, meet-ups, the hen do, a gift for the bride, wedding rehearsals and anything else that arises.
2. WEDDING DAY PREP
Naturally, the Bride may be a little stressed out or nervous on her big day, which is why you will be there to support her and keep her smiling and cheerful. It is a good idea to plan the day step by step and figure out in advance everything you will need and where it should be kept in the venues you are using. A fab idea which is currently trending is to have matching bridal shower lounge sets laid out to wear for photographs when being made up before getting into your gowns. This will also make for a nice surprise for the bride on the day. You will want to keep the bride’s favourite make up on hand all day so that you can be in charge of regular touch ups when needed! Tip: call it the Wedding Survival Kit and along with the make up include plasters (for those feet blisters!), safety pins, deodorant, perfume, hair grips, and flip flops so she can give her feet a rest and have a good old boogie on the dance floor!
3. WEDDING DRESS SHOPPING
The Bride is likely to bring a select few people to help shop for her dream dress, and you are likely to be one of those people! This may involve numerous shopping trips near and far, so make sure you are there to give your honest opinion, share in the decision making and keep the trips fun! Tip: Remember to take pictures during all your MOH & Bride outings which you can later use to create a photo-album or wedding scrap book as a gift to the bride and groom.
4. HELPING THE BRIDE CHANGE OUTFITS
The Bride may very well have plans to change her outfit from day to night. It will be your job to help her in and out of her dresses smoothly. And even if there are no plans to change - inevitably she will need to use the toilet, so make sure you are on hand to assist her with this task too! Tip: Did you know that having the bride sit on the toilet back to front helps if you’re tackling a bulky wedding dress?! You're welcome!
5. PREPARING A SPEECH
Although it’s not tradition, the MOH may very well be asked to prepare a speech to be read on the big day. To some people this is a doddle and standing up in front of a crowd and sharing funny anecdotes is a walk in the park, however to others it can be a little daunting and nerve-wrecking. Firstly, just remember that everybody in the room is there to celebrate and share the love of the couple, they will be in good spirits and eager to hear what you have to say so you shouldn’t feel worried! Secondly, the speech can be as long or short as you want it to be and feel comfortable with. A good tip is to have everything written down on cue cards to help guide you and keep you on track! Finally, one of the wonderful things about the internet is all the creative ideas and tutorials that are available for you to utilise online for free. Spend a few nights doing a little research into wedding speeches on YouTube and blogs etc and incorporate anything you like into yours! You can find some more great wedding speech tips here: https://www.weddingideasmag.com/10-ways-to-deliver-the10-ways-to-deliver-the-perfect-wedding-speech-perfect-speech/
6. PLANNING THE HEN PARTY
Now, this task will probably be the largest. It may also give you some headaches and sleepless nights in parts! However, it will all be worth it as soon as you see the Bride’s face on her hen weekend and you’re all celebrating her last fling before the ring! There are many different factors to consider when planning the hen do – you should start by asking the Bride for a list of people she would like to invite. Remember, not everybody attending the hen do may know each other, so it is a good idea to arrange some team-bonding activities during the course of the day, such as a hen party dance class to help break the ice and get the group feeling friendly and familiar with each other!
The hen party plans can either be shared with the Bride from the beginning or kept a secret until the day. Again, whether you love it or hate it, a group chat may be the easiest option to organise people and remind them of any payments they owe, update them on dates and plans etc. We will go into some more depth on hen party planning in our next blog!
7. PROTECT THE BRIDE’S TRAIN
Your duty is to keep your eyes on your bestie and adjust her train and veil at the end of the aisle and for any photographs so that it looks neat at all times. You can coordinate the other bridesmaids and groomsmen to help with this. You will also be in charge of looking after the bride's bouquet during the ceremony!
8. MAKE SURE THE BRIDE EATS
Nerves, excitement and being busy at the centre of attention may result in the Bride forgetting to eat during the course of the day. Some Brides have even fainted on their wedding day due to lack of food and dehydration! This can be avoided by having her MOH making sure she stays fed and watered from morning to night. Tip: have a bridal hamper at the venue with water, granola bars, mints and snacks at the ready!
9. BE HONEST
Being Maid of Honour/Bridesmaid comes with financial obligations. Every bride will have different expectations of their chosen person for this role. The best thing to do is be upfront with the bride from the offset about what you are expected to cover so that she knows what you are financially able to help with. Remember that you have been chosen as MOH because of your close relationship with the bride, so she should be understanding towards your situation and appreciate your efforts either way.
10. HAVE FUN!
The Bride has chosen you to be an important part of one of the biggest days of her life, the bottom line is to have FUN! Just remember the most important thing is that everyone is together to celebrate the newlyweds, dance, sing, laugh and make memories to last a lifetime!
OH, ONE MORE THING!
One more thing! Although it may be hard to steer clear of the copious amounts of champagne being handed to you all day, it is a good idea to take it slow and wait to have your celebratory drinks once the bulk of your duties have been accomplished. This way you can relax and enjoy knowing you did everything the bride asked of you - the last thing you want to do is end up sloshed in a corner by midday and forget about all your duties you worked hard to plan!
Good luck with the planning!
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